The Purpose In Life...

Today's iGoogle quote:

Whether we are rich or poor, educated or uneducated, whatever our nationality, color, social status, or ideology may be, the purpose of our lives is to be happy.

Ohhhhh, I liked this.  It warmed me to my toes and made me sit back and nod.  I considered this thought for awhile - and then I noted that before happiness was the word 'purpose.' 

What is your purpose?  What makes you happy?

Then I happened upon a story by Alice Brock:

Just because you have only six plates and three glasses is no reason why you can't invite 12 people to dinner. You can drink out of a jelly jar or a tin can. And there are lots of things you can use for plates — like hubcaps lined with tin foil. I once made a steak dinner in an apartment that had only one knife. We used scissors. It was quite memorable.


I believe in improvising. It's exciting; it's an adventure, a challenge, and a chance to be creative. Not being locked into a "plan" or a prescribed way of doing something leaves room for all kinds of wonderful stuff to happen. You don't always have to follow the recipe. I always use more butter, eggs and garlic than a recipe calls for, and the only unfortunate change this brings about is in my size.

I didn't study how to own and run a restaurant. I pretty much made it up as I went along. I was swept up with the idea — the fantasy — of having a restaurant, the chance to make something happen. It never occurred to me I couldn't do it; I only felt that way after I opened up, but by then it was too late. And of course making money at it was way down on the list of what mattered, and that allowed me the freedom to focus on creating something really wonderful.

I had no idea of how anything was "supposed" to be. I just barreled ahead, discovering all kinds of possibilities and making plenty of mistakes. And those are really great opportunities to learn. When something works, well, that's that. But when it doesn't, I have to think about why, and I have to come up with some other way that will make it work. Mistakes lead to discovery and that can produce delight, like cream of salt and pepper soup. I made it in a pinch once and believe me it's good. You should try it!

In my restaurant I rarely hired people who were trained — that wasn't important. As long as you could take down an order, treat people well and give them an experience they would remember, I didn't care if you were dressed up as a piece of broccoli. In fact it was the oddity that brought richness to everyone.

Some have said it was too bad my restaurant was a failure. Why, because it went bankrupt? I came away richer than any restaurant owner could possible dream of, just not in terms of money.

My belief in improvising was confirmed when I closed my last restaurant 29 years ago. I just walked away. I didn't make any plans; I left everything behind and came to live in Provincetown, where I'd always wanted to live and paint. I'm still making it up as I go along.

I believe there is no one way to do things. The way that works for me is the way that works right now. But that might change tomorrow.

Alice Brock was made famous by Arlo Guthrie's 1967song "Alice's Restaurant Massacre"  - I remember listening to that song with my family - it's a very happy memory.

So - I am challenging myself to be happy - I want that to be my purpose.  (... there are so many things that make me happy...)  I notice when I approach situations with, 'I really don't want to do this...' I try and catch myself and change it to 'I am so blessed to be able to do this...'

My purpose... is to be happy .... and blessed.

Love to you.

- §

(I have looked everywhere for that cream of salt and pepper soup... still looking!)

In Ten Years...

So I was talking to an old friend - he would chuckle at that use - he's older, but we've also known each other for... oh, I don't know... going on 10+ years?  Catching up, telling funny stories and just touching across the miles and checking on each other. 

I was telling him that I needed to get going - had to get the house clean because I have some friends visiting from Austin and they'll be staying the night. 

He said, "Simone, just remember the ten year rule."

Ah, yes, he's right.  In ten years I will remember their visit more than I will my clean house.  They, hopefully, will remember a fun time together and not recall the dust that didn't get a good swish or floors that hadn't seen a perfect sweep.

In ten years, I will be mom (and step mom) to 28, 27, 25, and 24 year old children who will not so much be children anymore.  I'll be 44.  Which is mind bending - but acceptable.  I will probably still have Dexter - but poor Dixie is up in years right now - I'm thinking she'll be waiting in dog heaven for the rest of us to get there.

I'm quite sure I will have traveled east.  I seem to travel west a lot.  I will (hopefully) have finished my book and I will spend much debate on whether anyone will read it.  (It would be nice if I could just bite the bullet and finish in the next five years...) 

In ten years I will be a bit wiser, but I'll also realize how much I really don't know.  I will have that convertible.  No doubt about it.  I hope I'm even trading in that convertible for something more practicle because I finally got it out of my system.

I may - maybe - might - be a grandma by then and I have decided that I don't want to be called "Grandma" or "Memaw" or "Nana" - I want to be "Bootsie."  Yes - you read that right and if it makes you giggle or 'pshaw' just a little then you get the point.  I like it.  "Bootsie"

I am quite sure that I will have traveled to Germany to see my German Cookie and her parents.  Maybe I'll have learned a little bit more German - maybe not.  I will make it a point to spend my money on travel and my 401K - if there is anything I've learned in the past few years is that you don't have to have lots of money to travel.

I will not give one flying flip about the dust - but I'm sure I'll find myself dusting atleast every other week... maybe more.

I will paint more.  By then I won't have to run a kid here or there... so I'll paint.  I'll listen to all of the music that I want, not worrying that someone asks to change the song AND I will attend many more a concert.

Ten years isn't that long.

I better get started on some of these goals now.

I wish you goals you reach and goals you dream for the next ten years.  I wish you sixty more.

Much love.

- Simone

Senior Moments

My daughter, Meredith, is a Senior this year.  New blog - new explanations.  I had Meredith when I was 15.  I was 14 when I found I was expecting her.  Frightened, unsure, in a very unstable environment, that story has been told on another blog.

What I can tell you today - is Meredith is a Senior is high school.  It is daunting and exciting and frightening, and amazing and wow... She is everything that is possible.  I could not have asked or expected for this child, born to a child, to be as giving, loving, patient, and persistent as she is.  She's a survivor.  She's a fighter. 

Tonight I sit with tears in my eyes - I'm happy.  They are happy tears.  Tonight we went to college night at the civic center.  Multiple dozen colleges were there with information and sales pitches and she listened and collected their brochures and cards to fill out and return.  She paid attention to cost.  She listened for activities outside of education because no matter her final decision on WHAT she will study, music will always be in her life.

We talked about her options on the drive home.  She told me what she thought she was able to do, and what she didn't know about - I explained that she hadn't given herself a chance to even study/explore some fields... patience, careful exploration...

So we sat and looked at schools - she wants to leave the Abilene area - this is good.  I will miss her dearly - but I want her to see and experience a life away from home.  We looked at activities, and costs to stay in dorms, cost of supplies - and important dates and information.

You see - Meredith IS something special.  She has a form of dyslexia called scotopic sensitivity.  The words swim on pages when she reads and throughout her high school years she has refused to take the easy road.  Her grades, always difficult for her to achieve, are in advanced placement classes.  I asked her to take the easy road.  She would be an all A student if she were in basic courses - but she always proclaimed that they were just too easy.  She made the choice to do more and be more even when it would have been easier to take the paths often traveled.

It's scary.  It's really scary.  I want to stand back and let her make these decisions and then I want to run in and fight and give and do for her.  I had to stand back tonight and when people would initially address me I would say, "it's great to meet you, but this is about Meredith tonight, I think you need to talk to her..." and they did... and she responded. 

So we sent off for information of two schools: West Texas A&M and SUL Ross State University.  I'm leaning towards WTA&M - but SUL Ross sure looks pretty.

We'll see - the decision is still in the air and she has to visit a few more colleges.

I am a proud mom.  There are no words to express - but every word you think of might come close.

... and this is one of my Senior moments... I'll have many.

Much love -

Simone

Simple

Practice what you preach. Or better yet, don't preach, just practice.

(No need to say more.)

Idle - It's What's For Breakfast



A quote that I read today: 

Idleness is not doing nothing. Idleness is being free to do anything.

I'm a mom.  I'm an employee.  I'm a significant other.  I am a sister.  I am a friend.  I am ... busy.  I think it has been drilled into most female heads that idleness is somehow bad.

Is it?  Really?  When was the last time I went to a park and sat on the grass and just watched the trees?  Or went to a museum and watched the paintings - ever changing in their non-changing state.  It's hard being idle now-a-days.  Faster, immediate, now - we live in a crazy world of cell phones, buy online, dvds at a click and so much more "NOW" stuff.

So I'm going to make it a goal to try to be idle.  To not read, to not make, to not craft, to not cook, to not talk, to not fix, to not run, to not answer - to just be.  Be idle - and see what the world brings along.

Love to you.



Today's Buddhist Quote

So - on my google homepage I have different quotes that pop up.  One of my favorites made its way onto my screen today:

You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.

I think we all need this reminder in our lives.  As moms, girlfriends, wives, friends, teachers, lovers - we are so apt to put others in front - doing more, giving more. 

Somewhere in there is remembering - I am completely fantastic and loved.  It's amazing.

Go with it today - try it tomorrow too.

Love to you - love to me.   §