Not Written by Me - But Because of Me

This was written 10 years ago, by a friend who I have known for almost 17+ years now.

He is/was kind - and quite loved to this day.  Thank you, Dante/Solomon/Machew.

...

Simone is a woman.
Simone is a parent.
Simone is a child.
Simone is a paralegal.
Simone is 31 years of a person.
Simone is a sister, a mother, a neighbor, a lover and a friend.
Simone is sometimes a blonde.
Simone is exceedingly open, and yet almost always clothed in some sort of mystery.

But what is Simone ... to me? Who is this person TO ME? How does she fit into my life?

Simone is myself, made with different cells, standing in a different land, surrounded by a different people.
Simone is a blue-green sea into which I dip the blade of my oar - sometimes calm, sometimes stormy.
Simone is a darker second heart, which was previously hidden and undiscovered (or, at least unclaimed).
Simone is a tantalizing woman who lives life as a scholar where I am a student.
Simone is a disciplined apprentice where I am a journeyman.
Simone is an exaltation of life, and explosion of spirit, a triumph of 'yes.'
Simone is the wellspring for my own self-awareness and self-acceptance.
Simone is knowing and knowledge, but still question and interest.
Simone is a persevering soul, teaching me patience and impatience in equal measure.
Simone is a yearning and burning for learning.
Simone is the fork to my own spoon, able to pick up what I can only stir.
Simone is the answer to the dull ache of emptiness that filled parts of me before I met her.
Simone is a vast and exotic desert, awaiting exploration of every dune, hill, mesa and oasis.
Simone is proof that I am not alone, and a reminder that I will never be alone.
Simone is the victim that turns tragedy into triumph.
Simone is a beacon in my life, shining a light as a direction and a certaintude
Simone is the slick shuffle of cloth across stone, punctuated by the staccato thump of feet on marble.
Simone is the upside-down frown.
Simone is the person I will love unlike any other, for the rest of my days.
Simone is a river of twists and turns and silt and locks and dams and fish and land - and always moving.
Simone is a celebration of color and light, fountaining into the air and splashing down on those of us close to her.
Simone is Hope embodied, and Love nodding an affirmation.
Simone is the most satisfying and fulfilling sexual partner I have ever experienced, bar none.
Simone is the salt in an ocean, weight that buoys my body towards the sun, and lends taste to my food.
Simone is a bright glass, through which I can see the reflections of another me.
Simone is a lighthouse on a distant shore, transforming isolating darkness into the surety of companionship
Simone is taking the step beyond thinking.
Simone is the far helix, the other half of the DNA of my own desire
Simone is as close as Life itself, and yet as far off as my own denial of who I am.
Simone is the second half of my heartbeat - the one that fills my body with much-needed oxygen
Simone is an anagram for: "So in Me"
and, right now, Simone is reading this and smiling.

IMF

::exhale::

I need impenetrable mental fortitude.

Or - at the very least - I need to build thicker walls and jump in deeper ponds and oceans.  Immersion at its very best.  Age (this makes me laugh) - is finding me prepared for a wound.  A wound not developed - a wound that is expected.

I hate this.

I hate it.

Frankly, I'm not good at this self-discovery life part of things... I've got self-discovery down.  It's the adding someone to this mix - it's discombobulating. And scary.   "Why can't we all just get along...."

My personality is one that invests ... I don't think that's an option for this life of finding that 'one.'

For the love of all that's holy - I know - (and I do) - he's there.

Just be careful with my fragile heart....

... and my impenetrable fortitude.

Not always easily... anything.

Impenetrable Mental Fortitude - IMF - It's going to take awhile.

By Nature

You are...

... a sprinkler head, rotating with metronome precision on a hot summer day - water dancing in the sky - twisting, turning, somersaulting like liquid diamonds in mid-air

... the soft spoken breeze through a meadow, graced by flowers, wandered by few - framed by spruce and pine

... the dust of a dirt road - not blocking the view - but beckoning to move forward, breathe deep - k.e.e.p. g.o.i.n.g.

... earth in hand, the smell of life built from the ground up - sun hats and sweat feeding the soil 

... an over the shoulder glance - half smile, whole spirit moment - completely present  - realized and real

... wispy clouds, contrails, setting suns and rainbows - gold and purple - magenta and green - the visual equivalent of "yes"

... rock monsters, mountains, snow, bubbling mud -
                       you are, by nature, the perfectly placed stone.

§

(Happy day, you beautiful souls.)